Homeschool Prom: Everything You Need to Know

When I first began homeschooling, one question I heard a lot was, “What about prom?”. I laughed it off because my daughter was 5. I wasn’t thinking about homeschool prom.

However, as the years went on there was a part of me that felt sad thinking that my kids may never get to participate in a milestone such as prom. Fast forward a few more years and I was surprised to hear that there was such a thing as a homeschool prom.

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And no, these are not the cringy and awkward proms you think of when you hear homeschool prom. They can actually be beautiful and tasteful events – and the perfect formal event for your homeschooled teenager.

How can my homeschool kid go to prom?

There are a few different ways that your homeschooler can go to prom. First is to be invited by a local public school student. When my girls were younger this is the way that the homeschooled teens we knew went to prom. It was a great way for a homeschooled teen to get to participate in prom.

The next option is to check with local private schools and see if they allow homeschoolers to attend. Many private schools near me allow this, and even offer homeschoolers to take classes at the private school, participate in sports, and extra curriculars like prom and graduation. 

These schools are typically smaller and faith based, meaning they are usually pretty open to allowing homeschoolers to join in.

The third option is for you to find a homeschool prom near you, or even start a homeschool prom yourself with your local homeschool group.

A homeschool prom is an event that offers an alternative to traditional high school proms, often organized by parents and coordinators of the local homeschooling community. With many of the same elements as a traditional prom, such as decorations, music, and dancing, a homeschool prom has some unique features.

We have done both of these options. The first year we drove about an hour away to participate in a homeschool prom with some friends my kids knew. The last two years we have had one of our own in a closer location and have had a lot of homeschoolers attend.

Some state homeschool organizations may also offer proms for their members.

What homeschool prom is like

Typically when you think of prom you have one of two thoughts. The first is cringing at the music, dress, or the sometimes bad things that are associated with prom. The second is to have bitter sweet memories about a good experience or wishing you can go back to high school and prom as a simpler time. 

Homeschool proms are more like the second one based on our experience, like traditional proms. They’re often based on a theme, like masquerade or roaring 20s. The attendees will wear attire based on the theme, or in a formal/semi formal fashion.  

The homeschool proms we participated in have been faith based, with prayer, dinner, modern but clean music, and clean dancing. 

The first homeschool prom we participated in had a pamphlet of modesty rules, a statement of faith, and dos and dont’s. This prom had well over 100 kids and was held in a community building. It was open to anyone.

The proms we have put on have been on a much smaller, more intimate scale. Our first prom had around 30 kids and we had it at a local wedding rental venue. Our second one was around 70 kids and was held at an old train station that is used for wedding receptions. 

We limited registration to kids that those in our homeschool group knew and skipped the pamphlet of dos and dont’s.

Homeschool proms will likely still have the traditional parts of prom that you think of like dinner, grand march, dancing, decorations, etc. They really run very similar to public school proms just on a smaller scale, and if faith-based, will likely have modesty and cleanliness standards when it comes to dress and music.

Benefits of Homeschool Prom

There are a ton of benefits to allowing your children to attend a homeschool prom. Let’s look at a few:

• Fun Memories: The memory of dressing up and dancing all night with their friends will likely be a core memory for our teens.
• Dressing Up: Many girls dream of dressing up and enjoy doing so. Attending prom allows them to experience a formal event and a day of pampering. Boys tend to take a lot less time to get ready, and may drag their feet doing so, but they typically clean up pretty nice, most of them enjoy doing so!
• Tasteful Fun:  Homeschool proms are a great way for teens to get together and have fun with their friends in a safe environment. No drinking, no worrying about what they may be sneaking out and doing, just good old fashion FUN. The homeschool proms we have attended have had chaperones galore, and limited the amount of slow songs, and required tasteful dancing. The kids know this, and I have never seen an issue arise at any of the homeschool proms we attended.
• Self-confidence: For teenagers, confidence can often feel like it’s in short supply. But there’s good news: by practicing social skills early and often, they can build up a reserve of self-assurance to draw on whenever they need it. This includes formal and large events like prom. Girls gush over how pretty each other look, boys ask the girls to dance (and vice versa). There is etiquette learned, and social skills that will last them for years to come.
• To “Fit In”: Yes, I said it. This is important, and when so many teens are participating in this high school ritual, we should not fault our kids for wanting to participate in one also. The year we attended our first homeschool prom the girls and I received so many comments about how cool it was that they got to “go too”. Whether we want to recognize it or not, our kids do want to do what they see their peers doing. Prom is no different.

How are prom king and queen chosen for homeschool?

Not all homeschool proms will have a king and queen, but those that do tend to choose them in a traditional manner. This includes attendees voting for queen, king, and attendants. Most proms will ask attendees if they want  to “run” for prom queen or king.

These proms may allow attendees to make posters stating “vote for me”, some may allow short speeches, and some may have neither of these options and use a simple sheet with names that you can write a check mark next to.

Homeschool prom dress code and etiquette

Homeschool prom depends on the type of event. The event organizer typically sets the standard of dress, and most homeschool proms will have stringent dress codes stating what students may or may not wear to the dance.

Because modesty rules vary so greatly, this means that no homeschool prom will be the same. Check with the event organizer before the event to get a copy of the homeschool prom dress code.

Homeschool prom near me: how to find local events

Homeschooling high school doesn’t mean that your students have to miss out on memorable high school experiences like prom. All over the country homeschool students are taking part in the tradition of prom.

To attend a homeschool prom, you want to start by contacting your local homeschool support group.  If you have no luck there, expand out to the neighboring counties and support groups, or even your state organization.

Ask around in state ran homeschool groups on social media. Chances are there is a homeschool prom near by. If not, consider starting one of your own!

Homeschool proms can be a special memory for your high schooler. While proms in general may get a bad rap due to unsavory elements, proms do not have to be that way.

As parents, we spend a ton of time modeling and teaching character, equipping our kids with social kills, and coaching them in the right and wrong way to treat others. 

Attending a homeschool prom is a great opportunity to see that effort come to fruition. Homeschool families spend years pouring into their children, and seeing your teenagers practicing being grown up and dressed up is something you do not want to miss.