What is Unschooling? Do Unschoolers Turn Out Okay?

What is Unschooling? Do Unschoolers Turn Out Okay?

Raise your hand if you’ve heard of unschooling!

When I first started researching homeschooling (back when my oldest was 4 or so), I was drawn to the name ‘unschooling’ because of the name. But I really didn’t know what it meant.

What is unschooling?!

Anything with ‘un’ in the name, to me, meant ‘outside the box’ or ‘outside the norm’ which of course was a huge turn on. After all – I don’t do normal.

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What Is Unschooling According to Wikipedia?

Unschooling, according to Wikipedia, is an educational method and philosophy that advocates learner-chosen activities as a primary means for learning.

Unschooling students learn through natural learning experiences including play, curiosity, family, social interaction, household responsibilities, personal interests, and travel.

In the unschooling approach, children initiate exploration of activities themselves. This makes the learning more personal, more useful to the child, and therefore better understood.

While courses may occasionally be taken, unschooling philosophy questions the usefulness of standard curricula, conventional grading methods, and other features of traditional schooling in the education of each unique child.

John Holt and Unschooling

John Holt was widely regarded as the father of unschooling. The term ‘unschooling’ first came about in the 1970s.

Because unschooling philosophy as a whole tend to reject curriculum, schedules, and grades, critics of unschooling worry that unschooled children will lack social skills, structure, and self-motivation.

For most unschooling families, the opposite is in fact true!

Unschooling parents often find their children better equipped to handle the ‘real world’ than their more traditionally schooled peers.

Life is learning and when kids are living fully and energetically and happily they are learning a lot, even if we don’t always know what it is.

John Holt

If you’re interested in learning more about unschooling, there are so many good books filled with great information!

Here are just a few:

Books About Unschooling

Home Grown

The Self-Driven Child

The Beginner’s Guide to Unschooling

God Schooling

So, What is Unschooling to Hess UnAcademy?

Unschooling is a life without school.

This does not mean unschooled children are not educated. This merely means unschooled children are educated at home – without a traditional curriculum.

It’s child-led learning.

Unschooled children are free to study and learn according to their own interests! They are also free not to learn anything that they have no interest in.

(Computer science lovers are free NOT to learn about Shakespeare, and vice versa!)

Unschooling kids are free to dictate their own education – totally and completely.

Some people think kids are not capable of dictating their own education. But unschooling parents put total and complete trust in a child’s natural curiosity.

Have you ever had your child ask you a question about a topic that you then further explored together? Did your child’s natural curiosity dictate where you went in this discussion and influence what other questions you explored together?

That is unschooling! (on a smaller scale, of course!)

Children have a natural curiosity that CAN be stifled (and all too often is!). Unschooling parents merely make a conscientious effort to feed this curiosity and see where it goes with natural learning.

Do Unschoolers Turn Out Okay?

Peter Gray (Boston College) did an extensive study on unschoolers and how they turn out.

Out of all the unschooling families and students he studied, only 3 felt the negatives about the method outweighed the pros.

Unschooled adults had glowing reviews and said they grew to be successful, independent, intelligent individuals.

Their only complaint about their unschooling years was the judgment and the misunderstanding about that approach from public schooled and traditional homeschooled individuals.

Only 11% of unschooled adults said that they ever felt they were behind in certain subjects in comparison with their peers – and that once they felt behind, they are able to easily catch up on their own.

All in all if you are a fan of the idea of unschooling, then you can definitely make it work for you!

Is Unschooling Legal?

Here’s a question we’ve received recently – is unschooling legal?

Many parents are still uncertain about the legalities of unschooling. The good news is that unschooling is completely legal in the United States, as long as certain requirements are met. These vary by state.

For example, some states require parents to notify local school officials of their intention to homeschool or follow certain curriculum guidelines.

It’s important for parents considering unschooling to do their research and understand the laws in their state to ensure they are in compliance. But with the right planning and resources, unschooling can be a rewarding education option for families.

Examples of Successful Unschoolers

There have always been examples of successful unschoolers. But more and more recently, successful unschoolers have begun making their mark in the news.

For example. Let’s take the 2020 Grammys.

Anybody familiar with Billie Eilish?

Billie Eilish – Successful Unschooler

Billie Eilish is currently the country’s (and perhaps the world’s) most famous unschooler right now.

Billie was unschooled as a child. Her mother encouraged her to discover and pursue her passions and dreams. Turns out Billie’s passion was music.

Billie first started putting out hits in 2016 (at 13 years old). In fact, you could say she was an overnight viral sensation.

And she didn’t stop there.

Now, not even 4 whole years later, she’s won multiple grammys (4 in 2020 alone) and many other awards. With more than 54 million followers, nobody can say her mother’s unschooling methods did not work out.

And she’s not the exception.

Here’s another example. Her name is Ayla Bondora.

Ayla Bondora – Successful Unschooler

Ayla was unschooled as a child. She had very supportive parents. Here is a story from her mother, Teresa. This story is posted with permission.

We are unschooolers, radical ones. My daughter would spend months and years online watching videos and doing “nothing”. I was worried and doubted but I was sure this was the right path so I bit my tongue.

When she was 17 -19, she lost 3 jobs in a row struggling with getting up early and following directions. We have always loved Disney but were too broke to go except once when she was 16. But at 19 she used the money she saved from work to buy an annual pass when we lived 8 hours away.

I was upset by the purchase and thought it was irresponsible (I didn’t say anything). A few months later she bought a bus ticket and met her best friend and went to Disney.

While there she applied for a freakin job not even living there.

She called and told me and I was like…okay? A few days later they interviewed her and the next day called and gave her the job. In another 2 days she had found roomates and a place to live. She never lived with me again.

It was hard but she was so freakin happy.

They hired her due to her vast knowledge of the Disney company from all those years of doing nothing online. They put her in a more advanced position due to her knowledge of computers. So she made higher than entry level.

She trained on the hardest computer system there. She moved up quickly. That was 5 years ago. She gets up at the crack of dawn and calls me saying how happy she is.

She is now in middle management. She got chosen to work the new ride construction over a year ago as liason with Imagineering and construction. She has full benefits, a new car and lives in a nice house.

She was chosen by the President of Disney to make this promotional video. She’s on the right, in glasses.

The kicker? They are paying for her college and she starts in a few weeks.

I can’t take credit because she did it all. I take credit for having faith in HER and NOT in a system that told me this wasn’t possible.

Those of you doing the same, I hope this helps in darker times….now watch the video while I beam with pride over here!

Edited to add: She has no diploma or transcript or grades. And at work, she doesn’t get grades either. Just evaluations that are always encouraging.

Teresa Bondora

Isn’t that amazing? Proof that unschoolers can grow up to be just as successful as everybody else. Perhaps more so.

Remember – these two women are not the exception to the rule. These kinds of success stories are very common. Your unschooled child can be successful.

Our Family and Unschooling

I am a huge fan of unschooling!

I used to think we were an unschooling family – and I was proud of it! We schooled our way and nobody could stop us!

During the course of this homeschool styles and methods series, I have come to learn that we don’t fit nicely into the unschooling mode.

In the unschooling approach, the path is 100% child-led. Which is great! I’m so glad that works for so many families!

But our family has some big projects we are trying to work on. Projects that are going to take us DECADES to complete.

We are going to need our kids to help us with those projects (if they’re willing) and so we guide their education more than a typical unschooling family would. (If you follow our blog, we will get more into detail on these big family projects over the next few months – stay tuned!)

We try and guide our children along the path we see laid out for them.

More Articles on Homeschooling Styles:

• Homeschool Basics – How Do I Start Homeschooling?
• Relaxed Homeschooling
• Hess UnAcademy Method
• Lifeschooling

More information on Unschooling can be found by clicking on the following links:

• Time 4 Learning – this one is great and talks about homeschooling laws and how unschooling fits into that
• Happiness Is Here
• Julie Naturally
• KQED.org – this is where that study by Peter Gray can be read